Roommates. Can't live with them; can't live without them (unless you can afford to buy your own place of course). I currently live with two of the most sensational women I have ever met! It is a great feeling to want to go home and see the people that live under the same roof as you. Both S & M are very patient with my weird tendencies; they always make me aware that I am a very interesting person to live with.
I have been a roommate my whole life! I am one of four children, I lived with three girls my junior year of college, and our senior year six of us lived together in a mansion shared with about 18 people. I can't believe that many people agreed to live with me!
Living with my friends made me realize how much my family tolerated when I lived at home for 18 years and then for the treacherous 13 months after college.
Below is a list of things you can do, but shouldn't do to annoy your roommates.
1. "Huh?"
I perfected this in high school with my mom. Whenever I was laying in bed and my mom would ask me to do something from anywhere outside of my bedroom, I would just reply "huh?" This has to be one of the most annoying responses. "Huh" is just a noise, it isn't even a word. If it is in the dictionary; I will tell Webster he is wrong. Why can't someone just say "excuse me what did you say?" "Huh" is the best response because my mom would just ask the question even louder, I would respond again with "huh". After three or four times of repeating this, she would finally walk to my room, see that I was laughing from annoying her, call me an idiot, and walk away. Eventually when I found the energy to rise out of bed, I would of course clean the bathroom, vacuum, and walk the dogs.
2. Doors are Closed for a Reason.
Maybe because I grew up in a home with three other siblings, I hardly ever knock anywhere. I know it is the considerate thing to do but it really just isn't the first thing I think about when I encounter a closed door. One of the funniest things my sister would make me do is open the door when one of my parents were in the bathroom. Of course no one wants to see what they are doing in there but it was their reactions that always made us laugh. A frequent response from my dad: "Are you dense?! Can't you see the damn door is closed for a reason!" The only thing that is worse about opening the door to something you don't want to or shouldn't see is just acting like it is completely normal. A couple of months ago, I whipped open my roommate's door at 7:45 am EST on a Sunday morning to her naked boyfriend getting changed. Not only did I not walk away, but I just patiently waited for him to put his clothes on, then asked them how last night was.
3. Halfsies.
My taste pallet is very unique. I love salty, sour, candy sweet and really could give two craps about desserts (other than fruit tarts). Ice cream, cake, and brownies can really just cease to exist for all I care. This awful habit is something I developed growing up. My dad and dogs are the vacuums for all the food I choose not to finish so I frequently will eat half of something and put it away knowing that someone else will eat it. This is a recurring thing with desserts and especially ice cream sandwiches. They always look really good but after two bites I am running for water because my tongue is sticking to the roof of my mouth. Nothing is better than hearing my mother, sisters, one of my roommates yelling at me for leaving a half bitten ice cream sandwich in the freezer. In college, I had a pint of raspberry sorbet that I really liked but only for a bite. That whole pint lasted from September 2009 until around graduation (May 2010.) If you are really paying attention, you would know that my response to someone asking me why I left my half bitten ice cream sandwich in the freezer would be "huh?"
4. Doing Your Part.
Sharing is caring. I am a great sharer. You can borrow just about anything from me other than candy. My roommates and I now actually share groceries. It works because we don't have three different heads of lettuce, 14 pounds of frozen chicken, and 48 eggs (except we do fly through eggs). If something is out, one of us will replace it. In college, it was definitely buy my turn to buy toilet paper. It is not that I didn't have the money to buy toilet paper, I was just choosing not to. Between me being "busy" and social, I really couldn't find the strength to go to CVS or anywhere to buy toilet paper. We stole TP from upstairs, I tried stealing from bathrooms on campus, and then just started using Sarah's tissues until they ran out. My roommates were becoming very impatient with me and I knew time was running out. The day I swore up and down I would buy toilet paper, I skipped class with my friend Amy, ate day old Chili's that was in the back of her car, and argued over how to sing the Yahoo song. After being a waste of life for about three hours, I realized that my face was swollen from the stupid cat Jazzy that Amy had. Amy rushed to get me benadryl to make the swelling go away and of course I was very tired after and fell asleep without getting any toilet paper. I really believe it was only hours before my roommates were going to start using my clothes as their toilet paper, so at 5 am I woke up and went to Walmart to replenish the house. This situation could have been easily avoided.
5. Cleaning
Not to toot my own horn, but I believe I am a phenomenal cleaner. Not only do I clean, but I am organized too! Currently, we are living without a vacuum so it is hairball city, but overall our current apartment is always neat. All of us are great with helping out; if one roommate cooks, the other will clean up, if someone has nothing to do, they will wash the dishes or clean the bathroom. Two years ago, I was organized but not the tidiest roomie. The one thing I dreaded the most senior year was doing dishes; with six girls they piled up quickly. Also, after a long day at school or whatever I was doing, the last thing I wanted to do was clean after cooking. My cop out was letting all of my dishes and pans "soak". "Soaking" was filling whatever I used with hot water and soap and letting it sit for about three days on average. In hindsight, it probably would have been better to just clean everything right away than having people yell at me and me responding "huh". No one really wanted to touch me four day old oatmeal bowl hanging out next to the microwave or in the sink; and really no one should ever have to look at that.
6. The Fake Sleep
Senior year, I slept in what was a sun room turned bed room to rip off college students. My bedroom had a door that also went to the outside which was a curse and a blessing. It was great to move things in and out but I didn't really always enjoy drunk people banging on my door looking for a party when I was trying to get some beauty sleep. I really love naps and think I may have spent a third of my life napping (in my bed, at parties, and in class.) In my mind, there is nothing better than falling asleep to Law & Order at 3:00 pm on a Tuesday for three hours. Writing that, I really miss college solely for the napping aspect. Living with six girls, some one is always around and that someone always want to hang out, talk about boys/sex/clothes/feeling fat/being poor/stressed for finals/what the plans for that night are/what am I cooking for dinner/can you believe our neighbors were up until 5 am/asking why the landlord sent me another email with a smiley :)/asking who ate their snacks. I really loved my roommates but sometimes I just didn't want to chit chat!! So what do you do? Build up a reputation for being a notorious napper and just keep your door closed when you don't want to talk. So if someone ever knocked on my door asking to do something, I would just close my eyes like I was napping until they walked away. This would backfire every once in a while when they heard my laugh out loud because of something funny I thought of. If I was really looking to play a good joke, I would let a roommate knock on my door for a really long time, have them walk away, and I would walk out my back door and walk in the front door like I was out the whole time.
7. The Heat
Maybe because I am half Pacific Islander, I love being warm. Even in the summer, I turn up the AC extra high so I have a reason so sleep with a blanket. I also lived with Sarah junior and senior year of college so heat is a constant battle that we duke out. Junior year, she lived upstairs, I lived downstairs, so the heat always "rose" and Sarah woke up sweating buckets. As I mentioned before, I had a door in my room that led to the outside so there was always a draft, which meant my room was an ice box! My room and Sarah's were next to each other and the thermostat was in my room so of course, I would turn the heat as high as I could to survive through the night and she would be almost in tears from being so hot. I knew sometimes it was a little to high, but I really set a new record when the chocolate Sarah's sister sent her for Valentines day melted all over her TV in about eight hours. Sarah was very upset, so of course after responding "huh" to her yelling at me, I vowed to keep the heat below 70 degrees (but did I?) This year, I am getting better with the heat (because I am actually paying for it) but I think Sarah walked into my room to turn the heat down last night; woops.
If you like who you live with, you should not do any of these things; not even once. I fear finding all of my things on the curb when I get home tonight. I will let you all know if I am looking for a new place to live because Lord knows my mom won't take me back.
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