TO THE SEXIE VERY ATTRACTIVE FEMALE CASHIER [ LISA ] . I CAME N ABOUT 12;30 SATURDAY THE 31 DEC , WITH MY SON AND YOU WERE STANDING IN LINE BEHINDE THE CUSTOMERS TO CLOSE THAT REGISTER OFF WITH THE CHAIN. I FIND YOU VERY ATTRACTIVE N IM ALWAYS CHECKING YOU OUT WHEN I GO IN THERE, I WISH I WASNT SO SHY LOL I WOULD TELL YOU TO YOUR FACE HOW ATTRACTIVE YOU ARE. IM VERY SERIOUS, I FIND YOU EXTREMLY ATTRACTIVE ESP WHEN YOU WEAR THOSE HIGH BOOTS MIKE XO HAPPY NEWYEAR B-SAFE
Location: PEABODY
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PostingID: 2826493748
Seems like a catch.
snuffaluffagus - m4w
Date: 2012-01-25, 11:00PM EST Reply to:
You: Beautiful, could be emo, probable psychobitch.
Me: Lonely, alcoholic, chronic masturbator
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PostingID: 2818549494
Someone with a Zoosk account help this man out.
WINK WINK - m4w - 47 (02744)
Date: 2012-01-20, 2:40AM EST Reply to:
Hi your name is Ocean1177 on zoosk, your from Vineyard Haven, MA, I got your note but I am not a paying member so I can't respond, I hope you see this and write to me here
Location: 02744
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PostingID: 2808858419
Who was da best booty shaka?
Shake Your Booty ... - m4w - 42 ( Foxwoods )
Date: 2012-01-17, 2:36PM EST Reply to:
... all night long. Let's do it again ..
Location: Foxwoods
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Definition of Facebook Creeping from Urban Dictionary:
1.) When you go on facebook to look at people’s profiles and or photos and you go look through their friends and their friends and so on.
2.) An act in which one looks at a friend's/stranger's facebook profile, pictures, and recent activity. Everyone denies their involvement in this act (when in reality most people do it when bored), then in turn accuse someone else of doing it later.
3.) Something we all do.
Facebook creeping is an art form. Like Urban Dictionary says in definition #3, it’s “something we all do”. No denying that. But everyone is different and publicizes their creeping styles in different ways. There are many types of Creepers, every Creep having their own style and personality. Let’s define them further shall we?
The Apparent: People who Creep and Tell. These are the Creepers who stalk the hell out of every one of their so called “friends”. Not only do they Creep, but they make it apparent by “liking” everyone’s status and commenting on their 7th grade BFF’s newest profile picture. These Creepers are my favorite. They’re honest with themselves and everyone around them. These Creeps are ironically the ones that update their status about 27 times a day, making sure to include what they ate for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. They make sure to let everyone know that they sat in 35 minutes of traffic on the Expressway too, boo friggin hoo. Most people delete these FB creeps, because their statuses “blow up their newsfeed”. I, however, like to keep the gems. They give me a good laugh every once in awhile. And plus, they must be pretty cool considering they have more “likes” than I do on my wall.
Mr. Wilsons: People who Creep, but play it cool. They are now admitting to themselves, “okay, fine, maybe I do creep a little.” And eventually admit… yeah, I saw your new Mobile Upload of your ugly baby’s first birthday party. Did I “like” it? No (because I didn’t like it). But, I somehow found myself 99 photos deep in the Mupload album before slapping myself and moving on to the next victim. They find themselves stalking their recent crush-of-the-week’s wall and all of a sudden they are all the way back to January of 2007 (we’ve all been there, done that).
However, these Creepers do occasionally “like” and comment on friends statuses and walls. We’re human, and it’s only natural to want to be included in the gossip and not have FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out, use it.). These are the honest creeps, and they account for most of the Facebook community.
Creepers in Denial: These are the ones you gotta look out for. These Creepers have discipline. These are the folks that say they don’t creep and can get away with it because there is no hard evidence.
No “likes”.
No comments.
They don’t even Mupload their pictures from the B’s game that most of us can’t help but want to “share” it with the rest of the world.
Most of these people have their profiles completely private because they KNOW the potential a facebook stalker can have, because they are the best of the best at stalking. They want to know everyone else’s details but would never share their own.
These Creepers are dangerous. If it were real life, these Creepers would be the ones with binoculars looking through a girl’s window while she’s getting changed. No proof of creeping, yet upon asking them a question about a recent activity, they seem to know every detail.
How do these people sleep at night? These creepers hold secrets. Get details. I envy their dedication to the art.
Considering my self esteem is solely based on the wall posts, likes, and comments on my FB, if Lizzy and I don’t get enough action from this blog today, I’m deleting my FB account in protest.
Thank you for writing this lovely blog SEM. Pictures of us that I love:
Sarah got caught drinking in public this night and when asked how old she was, she stated that she was 21 and the cop let her go! We were 19. This night, Liz and I fell asleep on a couch for several hours in a very crowded house.
Every morning I wake up (or Mary wakes me up) around 6:45 am. Between showering, saying I'm tired a million times, debating what accessories to wear, and eating breakfast, my roommate and I catch the number 11 bus at 7:22 or 7:28 everyday. My morning commute is pretty monotonous: the number 11 bus, red line to Alewife, and a walk through a marsh to my office. I used to be a public transportation snob but now that I am forced to take it everyday; I make the best of it. I have the most bizarre play lists, read lots of books, and dominate at least one Sudoku puzzle a day.
My bus trip from Eighth Street to Broadways Station is probably the highlight of my commute. The bus ride is kind of like the pregame to all of the chaos that can happen on the Red Line. My roommate and I will talk at the bus stop, but once we are on the bus, our iPods and Kindles are in use. You know you have a great friendship with someone when you can sit next to them and not feel obligated to say anything to them. Below is a list of the characters that we encounter on a daily basis.
Our great trip starts as soon as we arrive at the bus stop. Character number one is crazy Asian woman (not my aunt, cousin, or relative you jokesters!) who talks to everyone. She is very friendly; she says hi to everyone at the bus stop and chats with whoever she sits next to. I have even seen her hug the three year old daughter of the chain smoker with the straightest bangs that waits with us everyday. My favorite thing she does is when the bus is running a little late and she stands in the middle of Eighth street with her hands on her hips, looking for the bus, and reports back to people that she doesn't see it. Thank you, we all have eyes too.
As the bus opens its doors, our fingers are crossed hoping that we do not have Big Eyes for a bus driver. Big Eyes is very nice and waits for us if she sees us running out of our apartment, but she is not a safe driver. She will stop at stop signs and red lights at her discretion. When you think that there is no way the bus is going to fit down a narrow street with a garbage truck and cars on both sides, Big Eyes flies right through with no fear. I remember one day Mary and I got on the bus and Big Eyes was wearing this headband that had deer antlers; it just showed how much of an animal she really was behind the bus wheel.
There are a number of other bus drivers that we encounter but my favorite is Warren. I think if Warren was born maybe 40 years ago, he would have been a jazz musician. Warren is so nice and thoughtful; he grabs a ton of Metros and leaves them at the front of the bus for people to take. He is also a safe driver -- truly a saint in my book.
We pick up Shoe Box Woman at Eighth and Dorchester. This woman scares the hell out of me; I really try not to make eye contact with her. Shoe Box Woman gets on the bus, complains really loud about something, and then sits down. Sometimes, Shoe Box Woman is cool, calm, and collected, but other times its like she left her filter back on Eighth and Dorchester St. SBW is usually dressed in crazy colored sweatpants and sneakers. She also likes to sport sunglasses when they are completely unnecessary and sometimes a visor in the winter. I have not seen her smoke a cigarette, but I am 100% convinced she does. I call her Shoe Box Woman because she reminds me of the old woman on the cards that Shoebox makes.
Identical Twins but SBW is definitely more crude.
Next stop at Dorchester and the top of West Sixth is Slickback. Slickback might actually be a really nice guy, but from September to December, he was slicking his hair back. Mary and I decided that Slickback thinks he is the cat's meow (or like Mary would say, the cat's pajamas.) Slickback is actually a great dresser. He kind of reminds me of a younger Brendan Fraser. I actually think that Slickback would make all of the awful movie career choices too if he were famous. Right before Christmas, Slickback cut his hair and his whole persona changed. He actually appears to be a little stressed since he got his ears lowered. I hope he's okay and grows his hair out again soon; I think he will find true happiness.
Our last character of the day is Bus Crush who gets on at the end of West Sixth and D St. I am not even sure what makes Bus Crush the dreamiest man I have encountered on all of my commutes. BC is tall, always dressed in a suit, rocks a really nice watch, and has a great smile when he doesn't appear so serious. I think BC is a better built Ryan Phillippe (who I have the same birthday as which leads me to believe that I am his soul mate.) Both Mary and I are so captivated by BC's beauty that we are not even discreet about staring at him. Once I had to sit next to BC on the way home from work because it was the only seat available; if there were other seats open I would not have sat next to him because I don't think I could breathe in his presence.
After BC gets on the bus, it is only a minute until we are at Broadway and I depart. While getting off the bus, I say goodbye to Mary and promise to contact her via email as soon as my laptop is up and running. It is only minutes later than I am squeezed like a sardine on a train cart going to work.
I have some of the best friends anyone could ever ask for. I wouldn't trade them for all the candy in the world. Sadie is not only an amazing friend, mother, and baker, but also has the greatest music selection. Whenever I walk into Sadie's house, I am bombarded by music ranging from Ella Fitzgerald, Coolio, U2, or Adele.I can remember many summer days driving to the beach listening to our favorite jams. Here is a compilation of music that we are calling Sadie's Friday Throwback Beats.
1. "Freak Like Me" by Adina Howard
2. "Gangster's Paradise" by Coolio
3. "Love Will Be Right Here" by SWV (Our favorite song!)
4. "Poison" by Bill Biv Devoe
5. "I Wanna Be Down" by Brandy
6. "Knockin the Boots" by H-Town
7. "Hey Mr. Dj" by Zhane
8. "Just Kickin' It" by Xscape
9. "No Diggity" by Blackstreet
10. "This Is How We Do It" by Montell Jordan
11. "Jump" by Kris Kross - this kid is no older than 10!
I just finished a snack before I go onto my second job for the night. My snacks of the afternoon were an apple and a granola bar. It made me think, what happened to the Cookies and Cream granola bar that Quaker used to make? I need to investigate, its driving me crazy. These used to be my favorites! My mom used to be a variety pack of 60 and I would hide the 20 cookies and cream bars (Sorry Brian, Kay, and Sarah.)
Where are you?!
I searched Stop & Shop and BJ's but no dice. Quaker now sells a version that is dipped in chocolate but I don't want that!!
Gulping water from my emo Newbury Comics water bottle, wiping the sweat that had formed all over my body, rolling up my mat, I ventured into the cold thinking I had a great yoga class. As we were walking back to my friend's car, she said that she left the class satisfied because she didn't "suck at yoga as much as she thought." This leads me to my rant about yoga.
This past Sunday, the New York Times published an article saying that yoga may be doing more harm than help to Americans. Today, the Globe published an article from the point of view of a woman who was "relieved" that she did not give into the peer pressure of her friends and try yoga after reading what was published in the NYT. My relationship with yoga is like a long term on and off boyfriend; I started practicing in high school, gave it up in college, picked it up when I graduated, dropped it, and now I am in love again. One of my resolutions for 2012 is to attend one yoga class weekly; so far I have done that!
With that said, I can see that one may view my opinion as biased. First off I will say, anyone can get injured from any form of physical activity. People die skiing, people break their spines playing football, and I once gave a girl a concussion playing basketball. I have sported two sexy knee braces from running, rolled both ankles from soccer, and I once even knocked a toe nail off from dropping a weight on my foot. Should everyone stop being active because there is a risk for injury?
Physically and mentally, yoga is a great fit for me. Because I have had two knee injuries, yoga helps me dive deeper into stretching my IT band and keeping my body loose. While training for my half marathon last year, I was too exhausted to stretch after running. A week before the race, my right knee was giving out on me to the point that I could not run two miles on the treadmill. I stopped running and went to yoga four times that week before the race; I was able to run and finish my first half marathon. Aside from my knee, I don't sweat more in any other exercise than a 90 minute hot yoga class. Just in the past three weeks, I feel more toned in my arms, back, and core. Mentally, like after any other workout, I am calm, relaxed, and a little more sane.
It would be cool for me to say that I can do a headstand, I can hold my whole body up with just my forearms, or that I make my nose touch my shins but I cannot. I can do a full wheel (back bend) at most. This is where my yoga rant came from when my friend made that dumb comment about sucking at yoga. Yoga is like training for a marathon -- you aren't going to be able to run the full 26 (or 20 because they advise you not to run more than that) the first day of training; you have to build up to it! Any level class, yoga instructors do not expect you to be able to do advanced poses in your first ten classes; like any other exercise, they want you to listen to your body and know your limitations.
Have you seen the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall where Jason Segel is trying to do a handstand in yoga class? Of course this was more for humor, but if people really do not listen to their body and push the limitations too far, there is extremely high risk for injury. Yoga is not a competition, but an exercise practice with meditating involved. On top of that, like I mentioned before, a lot of yoga is great for injury recovery. While I was in physical therapy, I observed that a lot of the exercises that patients were practicing various forms of yoga moves.
I will be the first one to admit that I am a yoga advocate; if my friends are in an emotional or physical rut, I invite them to a yoga class. Some of my friends are still practicing yoga and some have decided that yoga was not for them. My friend's boyfriend went to his first yoga class last week and returned this week. Joe said that the classes have been a challenge but his arms feel stronger without using any weights. I am hoping to see Joe do a "Galvasana" or one armed crow by the end of the month. (Kidding this is how injuries happen!)
My favorite picture of Joe.
Currently, I am attempting to go to a hot yoga class taught by Tim every Wednesday at 6:00 pm at South Boston Yoga. Also, my cousin Whitney and her sister-in-law are putting on a yoga workshop February 5 in Hanover, please join (but don't if you are going to injure yourself on my watch because you don't listen to your body)!
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Re: Blonde lady, JP Licks truck - m4w
Date: 2012-01-17, 5:12PM EST
Reply to:
i don't like this
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PostingID: 2804980673
7-11 in Haverhill, extra plastic bag - m4w - 25 (Haverhill, MA)
Date: 2012-01-15, 8:49PM EST Reply to:
I'm looking for a woman who asked me for an extra plastic bag on Saturday while I was in 7-Eleven in Haverhill. You were on a bike with a dog attached.
Here's hoping this works. :)
Danny
Location: Haverhill, MA
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SS-Bookstore-Bellydancers - m4w - 36 (Des Moines)
Date: 2011-12-23, 1:14PM CST Reply to:
that group of girls were hot - love to chat more with the short blond
Location: Des Moines
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My favorite colleague is going to Cancun Friday until Tuesday; I am going to miss her dearly. Instead of trying to configure my body into her suitcase, I have decided that I am going to reflect on a tropical vacation I took almost two years ago. After months of deciding where to go, my friends and I decided on Punta Cana.
Typically, spring break stories that would stick in people's minds would be crazy hook ups, blacking out, waking up sans clothes on the beach. I have come to the conclusion that my friends and I are not "typical" so it makes sense that only bizarre things happened to us.
1. Third Degree Burns
Because I am half Pacific Islander, I think me and the sun are one. When the sun is out, I am tan, when the sun is away, I am still tan. I went to the Dominican with my family about four years before and left a bronzed goddess with those cool braids in my head. This time, I wasn't so lucky. After one full day of fun in the sun, I was the most burnt I had ever been. Not only did our burns hurt, but we actually looked hideous. Well, I actually looked hideous. My forehead was so burnt that it looked like leather, actual leather! As much sunscreen that I put on after that initial burn nothing helped. My skin all over was a brownish red, kind of like what a brick building looks like. All week our friends were ragging on us for how disturbing we looked because of burns but I just shook off the haters. It wasn't until we were in the airport in Miami that I had to wear a hat, hooded sweatshirt, and sunglasses indoors so people would stop looking at us.
It took about six weeks to get rid of this sunburn. I had burns on my stomach, thighs, and back that were just as bad as my forehead. I would wake up in the morning shedding skin. I had to change my sheets every other day!
Check out that burn baby!
Not healthy.
2. The Pee Pool
A couple of days in, two of our friends got sick from the food so they had to hang in the hotel room. The rest of us decided that we needed to check out the pool that had a swim up bar. The idea of a swim up bar is a great idea; what beats laying in the sun, getting color, but you aren't sweating, AND you can just swim and grab a drink?! Okay - well add about 150 college kids in a pool that have been drinking all day. This turns the pool into a pee pot. My friends and I spent about three hours in the pool drinking, avoiding each other's pee, trying to dunk each other in the water, and pouring drinks on each other's head. Writing that is so embarrassing but it was probably my favorite day in Punta.
A friend that we made in the pool that was not a college student.
We also witnessed a love/hate fight between two guys that were so drunk. At one point they were punching each other in the face and the next they were hugging each other. This went on for about 45 minutes. Of course we had to capture the moment.
3. Couple's Massage
The second to last day of vacation, I booked 60 minute massages for me and Amy. When we arrived at the spa, they served us champagne and told us to go into the room and get ready for the massage. At first we were confused that we were in the same room but did not really think too much into it. The massage was great! If I ever make millions, I am hiring someone to scratch my back and give me massages 23 hours a day. There was obviously a bit of a language barrier for me since I only know mija and caliente in Spanish.
At the end of the massage, the two masseuses tell Amy and I to take our time in the room. It finally dawned on us that I had accidentally signed us up for a couples massage! They probably thought we were the most idiotic couple that did not know how to apply sun screen. We left the spa as fast as we could.
We reviewed our massage with our friends who were inquiring if they should book a massage before they left. During the massage, I thought that the lady was massaging my buttocks for a very long time. It turned out that Amy's masseuse massaged her boobs for a long time! I did not get a boob massage (there is still some built up resentment about this.) Maybe this was part of their couples' spa package.
4. Corn Pizza
My last note is that this resort served corn pizza like it was normal. Who puts corn on pizza??? They never just served regular cheese pizza but then put corn on it! Of course Sarah, the Pizza Queen, grew to love it :-)
Not only was I burnt but I was also sporting a knee brace! Caliente!
Everyone loves a good prank unless it is played on them. I love playing pranks on people, but the second I think a prank is being played on me, I want to cry. I really can't remember the last prank that was played on me, but obviously it wasn't THAT good of a prank. Please don't play a prank on me. Below are a list of pranks that I have played or I have witnessed.
1. "Rocko"
I don't mean to beat a dead horse, but my dad is the easiest person to annoy and fool. When we were helping my brother move, he didn't know how to open my brother's car door (or acted like he didn't know); I told him he had to pull the handle three times and bang once with his knee and he seriously contemplated doing it until my mother yelled at me and told him to press the damn unlock button. I am not sure how I even came up with this prank, but I somehow convinced my father that my sister's best friend's dad's name was Rocko. Maddy's dad's name was actually just Gary. Maddy would be over our house about six days a week, so was my dad even though my parents are divorced, but I brought up her dad as "Rocko" enough that my dad really thought "Mr. G" was now "Mr. Rocko G". A couple of weeks had passed and I forgot that I had even conjured up such a prank until my dad sent me a text saying "MADDY'S DAD'S NAME IS NOT ROCKO." I guess my dad had swung by the house to pick up my sister and called Mr. G "Rocko", Mr. G looked at him confused and asked Maddy why my dad called him Rocko. Just to make my dad's blood boil a little more, I asked him where he got the name Rocko from because Maddy's dad's name was Gary.
2. Hold & Run
This isn't really a prank, but it is one of the two things that crossed my mind this morning while I was making tea in the kitchen at work. There was a really crazy, funny kid in my class from fifth to eighth grade. He used to make Pokemon characters out of clay and make the noises that they made in the shows. Another plus to this kid that I will refer to as "R" was that he would eat anything. He was once dared to eat glue in a science class and he guzzled it like no other! Kids in our class would also mix all of their left over lunches together and he ate it like it was no problem (We also did this with our friend Liz in college but she made us pay her money.) Almost everyday, "R" would raise his hand and ask to go to the bathroom. The teacher would ask if it was an emergency and he would respond "yes". EVERY TIME "R" got up to go to the bathroom, he would run up to the front of the classroom, holding his butt with his hands, and run out. I would consider this a prank on the teacher because not only would the class laugh, but they would look at the clock to see how long it took him to come back. The time ranged from three to thirty three minutes. Maybe "R" got sick from eating everyone's mishmash of lunch.
3. Pranks Gone Bad
Here is the second prank that crossed my mind today. Since I do not have a lawyer and make peanuts for work, I will say that all of the names in this prank have been changed. In seventh grade, we had multiple bake sales to raise money for various events. Cupcakes, cookies, and brownies are always a hit, but what parent bakes banana bread in hopes of it selling to middle school kids? Peter's family sent him in with banana bread that did not sell well. Instead of taking the banana bread home, Peter left the bread wrapped in tin foil for a couple of weeks in his cubby. Peter was a little guy, maybe a little under five feet tall and weighed about 85 lbs in the seventh grade (that is being generous). One day at lunch, Peter offered Ricky (these names are awesome) a piece of old, moldy banana bread. Ricky, not the brightest bulb, took the banana bread and actually ate it. After Ricky chewed and swallowed the banana bread, Peter let out a loud laugh, insinuating that his prank had been successful. Not only did Ricky run to the bathroom to puke right away, but he actually got food poisoning. Looking back on this, this was actually a very mean prank, but Peter in no way shape or form learned a lesson. I do not know where Peter is, but I remember being in California on vacation at my aunt's and hearing that there was a stabbing in Boston. Ricky was the one who had stabbed someone. He actually made national news. Peter is lucky he is alive today.
4. When Forr Freezes Over
A recent prank I played at work was on my friend Becky. I never go out of my way to play a prank but sometimes people just make it so easy. I strolled into the kitchen and saw that Becky left her famous Becky mug on the counter and she was no where to be found. The mug had a little bit of tea left and a tea bag. My initial thought was to just pick up the cup and put it in the freezer; because it was the end of the day, she didn't even know it was missing. The next morning, I arrived to work, went to the freezer, and put her frozen mug on her desk. I thought this was a prank because she would have to defrost her mug and clean it before she could have her morning coffee and tea. Instead of her being frustrated that her cup was frozen, Becky could not believe that her cup had frozen over night while sitting on her desk. This was more successful than I thought! I let my lovely colleague Jill in on my prank and all day we heard Becky tell people that our office must hit subzero temperatures over night to conserve energy and it froze her mug. I wish I saw these people's reactions, but because I am such a saint, I told her the prank I played. The last thing I wanted was for people to think Becky was a lunatic and believing that the office turned into an igloo at night and it froze her mug. A couple of weeks later, we stole her water bottle and put it on the ledge of the white boards in our office. We love Becky.
Jill sent me this picture of Becky's mug. I am not even sure where it came from.
5. Ditching Aunt Toot
Sense of humor runs in my mom's side of the family. Whenever anything happens, I know that I can call anyone and they will laugh. Pranking must be the same. This past fall, my great Aunt Toot moved to Massachusetts from Long Island. Everyone really loves her, but because she is so cranky, she really isn't pleasant to be around. For Thanksgiving, she was supposed to eat dinner at my aunt's house but they did not sign her out two days in advance so she could not leave (I am not sure if this was intentional or not.) My other aunt was going over for Thanksgiving dinner and thought that Aunt Toot would also be in attendance. My aunt who was hosting dinner, set up a walker outside of her bathroom, and told my other aunt that Aunt Toot was in the bathroom having "issues". My uncle was so excited about the plan that he got to add his line "She has diarrhea". After 45 minutes of my aunt Patsy thinking that Toot was in the bathroom, my other aunt suggested that she go in and help her. Patsy was dreading assisting her, but she did went in and saw that the bathroom was empty. Aunt Toot was still back at the nursing home for Thanksgiving and not rotting on the toilet. My aunt is a true prankster.
6. The Mask
My cousin Whitney lives with the biggest scaredy cat Lauren. I actually wish I could put Whitney, Lauren, and their third roommate Brittany on a sitcom. Lauren, as dope, fly, and buff as she is from working out at Peter Welch's gym, is afraid of her own shadow. I love that Lauren is so afraid of robbers and rapists breaking into her house, yet their first apartment, she had a door leading directly to her bedroom, and now they live in a ranch style house (Da Bebe Ranch) and her bedroom is probably the easiest one to break into. Typical O'Neill (our mothers' maiden name) thing to do, is to make a joke of someone's fears and weakness. What does Whitney do? She goes to KMart, buys a mask that she knows will scare Lauren, gets home from the gym before Lauren and hides in a room with the mask on until Lauren comes home. Lauren ends up not walking into the room that Whitney is in so she runs out in scares her. Lauren thought she was a bandit so she screams and cries. Lauren was so upset with Whitney that she was a horrible person and actually told her family on Whitney. Every time I sleep at the ranch I am so tempted to play a prank on her.
I love Craigslist. When I was unemployed, I applied everywhere including here. Now, if I am passing time, I look at Craigslist's Missed Connections. If you have never looked at these, you are truly missing out.
Here is a gem that my friend found today:
you are the sugar to my coffee - m4w (I miss your face)
Date: 2012-01-12, 10:23AM EST
Reply to:
you are the sugar to my coffee,
you are my cream,
you are the butter on my toast,
you mean everything to me,
you are the syrup on my pancakes,
you are my sausage link
you are my slice of bacon
you are my morning sun
even when it rains
an I've yet to hold your hand,
you are my moon beam
on a cloudy night,
you are my wish
upon a shooting star,
you are the fire that burns
in the depths of my soul
deep inside my heart
the woman I want
beside me as I get old
the greatest love story
never told.
While that post oozes love, this one is full of anger:
Junkie - m4w (Wakefield)
Date: 2012-01-11, 11:35PM EST
Reply to:
So let me get this straight. You bring me out here to be with you and when things just start to get going you go behind my back to some ugly ass guy who feed you the bullshit that you claim didn't effect you decision. Basically you screwed me over. And now someone calls you a "junkie whore" and the first thing you do is blame me and my friends. I wouldn't blame them for doing that, but you are wrong. Either you story is full of shit and your just playing some more games to keep screwing with me , or someone else knows who you really are! And to top it off I bet you got played by your new f-buddy so he could get back at his girlfriend. Sure I'm bitter, but you know what when it all falls apart in your face (and it will), you realize what happened. Oh yea ill still be here... to tell you I told you so! Your life is not great, your life will be the same as your mom's. Sad, miserable, and a social drain on everyone. Enough of your games, I will not let them keep getting to me... There is much better out there for me!
And then there is plain weird with grammar mistakes. This is also close to my work.
Rainy days and Mall Parking Lots - m4w - 43 (Solomon Pond)
Date: 2012-01-12, 11:53AM EST
Reply to:
I have to admit the temptation to contact you is borderline overwhelming!
Hoping to make it through the withdrawals, even debated for 2 days over doing this, its a slip but not a retreat.
I do wish I has the strength to deal with this, that empty house you have access too is sooooo enticing...the things we could have done!
I feel better already just posting this...anyway...back to reality
What are the chances that J.A.R. will ever read this?
J.A.R I want be with you - m4w - 27 (Revere/Saugus)
Date: 2012-01-11, 7:05PM EST
Reply to:
J.A.R we grew up with each other were each others first loves. I'm married but still love you. Please let me know the neighbors across the streets name. I know your with some one and I'm married but I would leave her for you. Not a day goes by that I don't think of you and all the chances I had.
This man thinks highly of himself and sounds cute.
Grey Range Rover - w4w (Walmart Quincy)
Date: 2012-01-11, 10:32PM EST
Reply to:
I saw you looking at me while I was putting groceries in my car. I wanted to say something but I was kinda shy. I am spanish and very sexy. I doubt you will see this but if you do PLEASE GET IN TOUCH!
I am currently suffering from writer's block. My roommate has been threatening me to post something this week so I took a shortcut (because we have to do what we have to do.) My lovely friend X took me under his wing and wrote a blog post about ANYTHING he wanted. I think he nails this on the head :-)
How to Lose a Guy in 1 Month.
Hello!
My name is Mr. X. I am a 20 something guy enjoying all that the lovely state of Massachusetts has to offer. I have been in all the situations people our age utilize to meet someone of the opposite sex: bars, friend’s parties, family setup, blind dates, office romances, online dating, random places like the super market, and all have provided great experiences and stories. After a few convo’s with “L”, I thought why not offer the guys perspective on at least one aspect of this crazy dating world many of us find ourselves in.
Currently, as a self diagnosed “nice guy who finishes last” I feel the hardest part I have been finding in navigating the dating scene is not meeting a woman’s “checklist” criteria. What is “checklisting” you say? Every girl has a complex algorithm of categorizing and critiquing a guy that makes launching a man into space look easy. This “checklist” is a rating that they put on every aspect of a man, whether they realize it or not. Sometimes it is as simple as how he looks, sometimes it is as complex as “I can’t put my finger on it but he just doesn’t seem to have enough edge.” Men are asked a million questions with everything from tone to how we hold a fork being evaluated. We are forced into non- traditional channels like texts that involve emoticons. Our FB profiles are combed to understand what we looked like in 2003. OK, I know I am being a bit over the top, but you get the idea, a woman wants to know everything thing about us as fast as possible to make a quick decision about how worthy of their time we are.
Now before you think I am placing all the blame on woman. Men, just as much as woman, have their own methodologies on dating. Men look at woman like sports cards. Everyone woman has stats that form her“Sports Card.” When I meet with my friends (both guys and girls) and I tell them about a new girl. I read her stats off right away. Where is she from, what does she do, what does she look like, family setup, interests, noteworthy moments in her life, and so on. Every nugget of our conversation and interaction is put into a category on a mental “sports card” that describes who she is. Men do this so they can compare cards to each other, both in their own collection and to other guys. You always want to be the best, have the best, and show off that you have it. And when that card no longer seems to hold the value that you may be looking for, you trade it away for a better card.
The bottom line using the “checklist” and “sports card” tactic - they are two sides to the same coin. Each party is evaluating, pigeon holing, and using pre conceived notions to reach a final judgment that in most cases is not a true picture of a person. Time and joint experiences are the keys to really connecting with someone.
Too often we don’t let things happen naturally anymore. Women don’t give men a chance because of prior issues or scars from earlier relationships. Guys don’t want to put in the effort or be chivalrous because they feel girls are just “playing games” or “manipulating them”. In the end I titled this post, how to lose a guy in 1 month, as this is the time it takes the truth to finally bubble up. It is around that mark when people start being real. So I have two simple requests for the readers of this blog and this post as I fully support and enjoy what “L” exposes regarding dating/relationships.
1.Women – Please give guys a chance, for once, open your MIND, let a guy in a bit, and don’t be so quick to judge.
2.Men – Go out of your way a bit, buy that drink for the girl, hold a door open, bring a flower, use your ears and listen, don’t be afraid to stand up, open your HEART, and treat a girl right.
Have you ever walked by yourself and thought of something funny and laugh out loud? Today on the train at 7:50 am I was laughing so hard to myself that I knew this was a story I had to share.
One Saturday night, sophomore year of college, I decided that I would step up to the plate and be the designated driver. I knew my stunt of drinking early and not being able to drive was getting old with my friends and giving up one night every blue moon isn't so bad. My go to move was just to drink a Red Bull or carry a Fuze bottle and tell everyone I was wasted. No one can actually tell when I am drunk, sadly unless my eyes are rolling to the back of my head, I think I appear more normal when I am drunk than sober.
This was me at the party actually sober.
The party was in the basement of a house on Hobart lane. Of course this meant there were a million people squished into probably 400 sq ft and a fog machine stinking up the place. A random thought - I always hated but thought it was funny when someone farted at parties like this because it is one of the meanest things you could do to a lot of people at once. It actually ended up being really fun but of course the 12:30-1:00 am boomboom mood was being set. Everyone was drunk, horny, getting tired, so hook ups are doomed to happen. Even now, I love making bets on who is shagging who at the end of the night. I don't think alcohol is a good excuse for irresponsible actions but it is very entertaining when you get to watch everything go down.
Saying this, I actually have no excuse for my actions other than bad judgement. My friend (who will not be named) and I met two boys that we thought were really cute. Of course after ten minutes of small talk, I am making out with this boy who I thought was your average UMass Joe. After watching my friend and her boytoy drunk grind and make out on the basement floor; mah gurlz and I knew it was time to head back to campus.
Mah gurlz & I (Look at mine and Nat's kissy face!)
As we were walking into our dorm, we saw the two boys that my friend and I had sucked face with in Hobart. It turned out that they lived in our dorm (living in a dorm with 23 floors this was normal to not know everyone) so we ended up hanging out with them when we got back. I cannot recall how everything went into play, but my make out buddy ended up in my room and all of my friends vanished.
With the lights on, this kid was a drunk weirdo, who could not keep his mouth closed. His sentences were jumbled, his eyes were blood shot, but worst of all he just kept making weird kissy faces with his open mouth to me. I could be mistaken but I swear he was wearing Sketchers sneakers. Instantly, I was confused on how I let this happen soberly. This kid would not leave my dorm; I don't think it was because he was being forward but because he was so drunk. What was I supposed to do? First thought: grab my two friends who were across the hall and have them look at the weirdo that was lounging on my futon, ready to have sexy time with me. After laughing for about five minutes, we decided to grab our BFF Carlos to save me. He said to go back into my room and give him five minutes.
For the longest of what I thought was five minutes (three hundred seconds), I chatted with Open Mouth Boy with a five foot distance in between us. Just when I thought I was going to have to tell this kid I really wasn't interested and the basement was dark so I made a mistake, there was a huge bang on the door. Carlos is banging on the door screaming "Who are you in there with? Who are you in there with?" I really did not know what he was actually doing because I just told him I was in the room with the a boy who had the exact opposite of lock jaw. I open the door, and there stands Carlos in his boxers (with Heather and Lindsay behind him) and a beer in his hand saying "I gave you my heart, now you have it across the hall with another dude. If you gon' talk to dudes, Imma talk to other bitches." Not only did Carlos scare Open Mouth Boy, I think it actually sobered him up. OMB put on his Sketchers and back pack full of probably Busch Lites and went back to his dorm. I am eternally grateful for Carlos for what he did.
I think after this incident, I saw OMB boy about four times on campus until I graduated. Every time we saw him, Heather made sure to lay it into me that I made out with a boy who ate flies all the time. I digress. My friend actually ended up sleeping over OMB's friend's dorm and left her shoes there. She never got them back. Friend&Lizzy 0 - HobartPartyBoys - 0 + pair of girl shoes.
This picture was another night but it just makes me LOL. Why did no one ever tell me the duck was a bad look?
Not to toot my own horn but I am a great cook. I believe that I inherited this gene from both sides of my family but I cannot recall because my dad likes to clean more than cook and my mom now cooks once every blue moon. My Uncle Marc is probably one of the best cooks in the whole world (we are not blood related but it doesn't matter); my cousin and I keep encouraging him to have a cook show on YouTube where he can talk about his belief in the fourth dimension and play a song at the end on his guitar. My number one, win ANYONE over recipe is my chicken parm (I don't even like cheese THAT much and I know it is good.)
While I am on the subject, here are other things I am great at:
1. Parallel parking
2. Organizing
3. Layups (and only layups) playing basketball
4. Tying bows
5. Speaking French (but not writing it!)
6. Being tan
Things I need to improve:
1. My baking skills
2. Applying sunblock
3. Listening to my voice mails
4. My yoga moves
5. Nothing else, I am pretty close to perfect.
Obviously with the New Year here and the world ending in December, I decided it was really important to have some resolutions. Of course, I am always thinking "save more money", "eat healthier", etc, but I am pledging to cook or bake one new recipe a week or every two weeks (I can't put too much pressure on myself or I will crack.) My thought process: I will save more money and eat healthier if I learn to cook more. Because I really do not like dessert, this really will not hinder my health.
Yesterday, my friend emailed me a simple chili recipe from scratch. See Below:
Ingredients:
1 large white onion, coarsely chopped
2 bell peppers (any color), cut into 1-inch pieces
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 tablespoon chili powder
1 teaspoon chipotle chile powder
2 teaspoon packed brown sugar
1 (28-ounce) can whole tomatoes in juice
1 (19-ounce) can black beans, rinsed and drained
1/2 cup water
2 cups cooked turkey, cut into 1-inch pieces
Preparation:
Cook onion and peppers in oil in a heavy medium pot over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until golden, 12 to 15 minutes. Add spices and brown sugar and cook, stirring, until fragrant, about 1 minute. Add tomatoes with juice, breaking them up with back of a spoon, then add beans, water, and 1 teaspoon salt and simmer, covered, 15 minutes.
Stir in turkey and let stand, covered, until heated through, 5 minutes.
What I ended up doing:
Ingredients:
1 large white onion, coarsely chopped
1 1/2 bell peppers (any color), cut into 1-inch pieces (because too many green pepper is sick)
3 tablespoons vegetable oil (more or more)
3 tablespoon chili powder
2 teaspoon chipotle chile powder (this is what I searched Stoppies for!)
3 teaspoon packed brown sugar (so it wouldn't burn my roommates mouth!)
1 big pinch of salt
1 big pinch of pepper
1 VERY BIG PINCH of pepper flakes
1 (28-ounce) can whole tomatoes in juice
1 (19-ounce) can chick peas
1/2 cup water
1.5 pounds of ground beef
1/2 a cup of flour, maybe more.
Preparation:
Cook ground beef with all the pinches of salt, pepper, and pepper flakes for about 13 minutes on a greased pan. Do not overcook, it will cook more in the pot!
Cook onion and peppers in oil in a heavy medium pot over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until golden, 12 to 15 minutes.
Add ground beef with spices and brown sugar and let simmer for about two minutes
Add whole tomatoes, water, and chick peas or whatever bean your heart desires.
You will notice that it is very watery so add some flour to thicken it up a little. (I think I added a little too much flour but my roommates still ate it AND brought seconds to work.)
Stir for a while so nothing is clumped together and let it sit on a low flame for about 15 minutes.
You can serve with cheese or sour cream if you would like to (but keep those resolutions in mind!)
I really wish someone could have witnessed my actions the past 48 hours. I hiked with my mom on New Years day, ate Burger King that put me into a seven hour coma, watched about eight episodes of Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. Yesterday, I forced myself to be productive by running for an hour, went to crazy town at Rite-Aid and almost cried when they did not have any agendas, walked around Stop and Shop for about 30 minutes looking for a special type of Chili powder, painted a toe nail then it fell off, ate almost a whole bag of frozen raspberries, watched more Law & Order, and called it quits around 10:00 pm.
